Dickens & Suess

Tomorrow is my family's annual Christmas Eve Shindig at my Aunt Ida's house. This has become a "new" family tradition of ours. I say "new" because we actually used to do it years and years ago, but we fell out of practice until Christmas 2000. After my cousin Bridgette passed away we decided to try to gather together every Christmas Eve as a family. I have taken it upon myself to plan the event every year and Ida has volunteered her home for us during the night. I can't take any of the credit really though...all I do is mail out Christmas cards with reminders to meet at Ida's on Christmas Eve. Nothing too strenuous. Its a simple affair really. People bring food, soda pop, and their pretty little festive selves. We play games, take pictures, talk, sing...nothing too complicated but lots of fun.

We also get together on my Mom's side of the family as well. Usually the Bowles' clan will gather together somewhere at some point and time. We have a dinner. If there are gifts to exchange, then we pass them along. Otherwise, we just enjoy one another's company. In my more immediate family on my Mom's side, every year we get together at someone's house (this year it will be at my house) and we exchange gifts (we draw names earlier in the year) and nosh on some grindage (sorry, random Pauly Shore reference there...couldn't help myself). Nothing extravagant. Nothing boistorous. (I like throwing in words I can't spell but make me sound important.)

At any rate...the point is this...it doesn't take a lot to enjoy the holiday.

This year I can't tell you how many people I've heard say "I can't afford Christmas this year." or "We're not having Christmas." or "Christmas costs too much."

I keep my mouth shut when I hear these things. I try not to judge folks. My opinion, as much as I like to share it with people, really doesn't count for much in the whole grand scheme of things. And Lord knows, I've spent too much on Christmas gifts this year. And the truth be told, if it weren't for bill collectors harrassing me on the telephone, I would have spent even more on gifts for people. I enjoy buying presents. I'm horrible at wrapping gifts, but I even enjoy that. I like to give to other people. Its why I donate to charities, why I volunteer when I can, why I want to go to UK and get my Masters in Social Work...I like to give. But...Christmas time is a hard time to give to people. Most gifts cost money and some of them cost a great deal of money. And its really a lot like Scrooge told his nephew...what is Christmas but a time to find yourself "another year older and not a penny richer" and a time "for paying bills without money." Its sad but true.

But that's not the point.

We all know the story behind Christmas. I'll not "preach the Gospel" to you on here. You are free to believe as you choose to believe. But it is my hope that you don't believe that all Christmas is about is G-I-F-T-S. Because its not.

Whether or not you are a Christian at Christmas isn't my concern, but if you think that you "can't afford" Christmas or that you just won't celebrate Christmas because its "too expensive," I urge you to think again.

Christmas isn't about gifts. It isn't about how much money you spend or who you buy for. It isn't about Black Friday sales in November or After Christmas Sales on the 26th of December. It isn't about pretty paper and bows. Or tinsel on trees.

You can't cancel Christmas because you have too many bills to pay. You can't make Christmas wait until January because you need to save your cash for a rainy day.
Christmas isn't about any of that. Not really
We get so caught up with all the wrappings and trimmings, all the commercials, and the "I Wants" that we forget what Christmas time is really about.
Christmas, if you are a believer, is about the ultimate gift from God...his only son, given to humanity to suffer and die for our sins, so that we can have a chance at an eternity of peace and love in Heaven. Whether we accept God's gift to us, is of our own choosing. Simple as that.
If you don't follow the teachings of Christ (or of any religion at all), Christmas is still worth celebrating. For those of you that aren't Christian followers, Christmas can (and should) be about family...about friends...about sharing a little love with the entire world wherever you can.
Christmas is for memories. Most...no...ALL...of my BEST Christmas memories don't involve gifts at all. I remember getting a bike one year, but I don't remember what year it was. I remember getting all the Barbies I asked for another year, but they weren't important enough for me to play with every day of my life. I can remember gifts I got and gifts I gave, but they weren't my BEST memories. My BEST memories always, ALWAYS involved the people I was around. Laughter shared. Stories told. Little ones that grew up too fast. Older ones that passed too soon.
Christmas isn't about gifts or money or mindless consumerism. Christmas is about L-O-V-E. A love that we should carry in our hearts every day of the year. We should keep Christmas like Scrooge kept Christmas after his visits from the three Spirits...in his heart all year long. And we would do good to remember the wise words of one of my favorite authors:

And the Grinch, with his grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow,
Stood puzzling and puzzling: "How could it be so?
It came without ribbons! It came without tags!
It came without packages, boxes or bags!"
And he puzzled three hours, `till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!
"Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store."
"Maybe Christmas...perhaps...means a little bit more!"

goodbye my friend...

I love animals. I love them dearly. I'm not a vegetarian or a member of PETA. But I have a profound respect and love for all God's creatures, no matter how small. I've always been that way.

Some members of my family have nicknamed me "Ellie Mae" (as in Ellie Mae Clampett) because I've had such an assortment of critters through the years. I'm known for bringing home strays of all kinds, not just cats and dogs, but 'possums, raccoons, deer...whatever needs a home or a surrogate "mommy".

Almost four and a half years ago, while working on our family dairy farm, I came across four little kittens. They were roughly two weeks old and their Mom had abandoned them. They were scared, alone, hungry, and cold, and I took them home with me. The first one I found was a little girl. I named her Poop because she was "the sh*t". :-) I called her "Princess Pretty Poop" to be exact. I'm not sure why, the name just stuck. She's the only cat I know named Poop.

Anyway, I raised those cats. All four of them. I was their Momma Cat. I fed them every two hours, even through the night, I bathed them, I potty trained them (not just teaching them to use the litter box, mind you, but after every feeding I had to use a warm wet washcloth to "stimulate" their privates and causing them to expel their urine and fecal matter...technical terms huh, but it is what Mommy cats do when they lick their babies after they eat, cause kittens that young can't use the bathroom by themselves and require stimulation...there's your cat biology lesson for the day). Anyway...I was the Cat Mom.

Eventually one of the kittens died. He had been stepped on my a calf when he was just born and because of that, his head was malformed and he couldn't be taught to eat solid food. We couldn't keep him on the bottle forever and eventually he died because he wasn't getting enough nutrients. He always had plenty to eat, mind you, but just not enough vitamins and minerals. His name was Weebles, because he wobbled when he walked and sometimes walked in circles...but he never fell down. :-) He was a sweet cat...ill tempered as all get out, but sweet none the less.

Poop and her brother (Bart) and sister (Emmie) made it and I moved them in with my other cat, Oliver, when they were six weeks old (he's just a few months older than them). All was well in the kitty cat kingdom until about two years ago. In the winter of 2007, Emmie and Poop fell ill. They had a lung infection. I took them to the vet. He tested them for feline leukemia and it came back positive. After some antibiotics and some long and stressful nights of me sitting up with them and forcing them to drink Pedalyte because they wouldn't eat or drink anything else, they finally pulled through, although Emmie's lungs were never quite the same. But Poop was fine.

Unfortunatly, there is no cure for feline leukemia and it is VERY contagious to other cats. It basically breaks down a cat's immune system, so anything they catch can be the death of them. Poop and Emmie were born with it, that means that Bart probably has it as well, although I've never had him tested. And Oliver, because he was raised with them and has shared food and water with them, probably has it as well...eventhough I've never had him tested either. For all intents and purposes Bart, Poop, and Oliver have all been pretty healthy and Emmie's only real problem is that she gets congested easily.

That being said, I lost Poop this morning.

She had gotten sick and wasn't eating a lot, but she was still eating and drinking...just not a lot. She had lost a lot of weight too. My vet lives an hour away and my cats don't travel well. So I decided I would just go get the usual meds for the sickness, which is what I did.

Knowing that they have feline leukemia, I knew that it was just a matter of time before I lost them, so I didn't want to add to any stress on them by forcing them to go back and forth to the vet, just to prolong the inevitable. If the vet was five minutes from my home, I might would do it, but an hour up there and an hour back was too traumatic for them.

Anyway, the medicine didn't work this time. Poop's breathing got worse. She stopped eating and drinking altogether. I knew what was coming, so I had been sleeping in the floor with her for the past few nights...just to let her know that her adoptive Mom was there. This morning I left out to go feed my outside critters (chickens, dogs, a couple more cats...) and when I came back to check on her, she was already gone.

I'm terribly upset. These were my kitty "children". And although I know it would NEVER compare to losing a real child, she was my pet, my friend, my family...and I was very attached. So for all you pet lovers out there, tonight give your critters an extra hug from me and Poop and say a little prayer for my broken heart while you are at it.

Thanks.

(Poop facing off with my pet duck, Tenbrooks.)               (Poop & Bart)                                           (Poop after a bath.)

Birth Blessings

Maybe this should belong in my other blog, I'm not sure. It does involve pregnancy after all, but I'll put it here all the same.

I'm known for a great many things in life: having lots of pets, having weird pets, getting tattoos, making up my own catchphrases, blah, blah, blah...I am also known for throwing Birth Blessings parties for all the preggo ladies in my life. This is a new addition to the list of things that make me pleasantly strange. I just started having them last year. I started with my    younger cousin Kayla when she was preggers with Miss Story Jade (whom I like to call "Turnip Head").

Everyone asks me what exactly a Birth Blessing consists of, so here is an explanation and some websites you can look up in case you want to have one of your own.

First things first, anyone can host a Birth Blessing party, even the Mommy-to-Be herself. And unlike the unspoken taboo of having a baby shower for each child you birth, you can have as many Birth Blessings as you so desire.

That is the thing I like best about them really, you can cater them to fit the person. True, you can do the same with a baby shower, but the baby shower focuses primarily on the baby, whereas a Birth Blessing focuses on the Mother.

Obviously men can be involved with a Birth Blessing as well, but mostly it is women that participate...older, younger, childless, houseful of kids...it doesn't matter really. It can be religious or not. You can add "activities" to it or keep it simple. No decorations or door prizes required.

Here are some websites to help you out with ideas and give you a better explanation than I can:
www.birthblessings.com
www.birthbeads.com/blessingway


Here are a few details of what I've done at the Birth Blessings I've been a part of:



At Kayla's:
 ~We baked cookies, made chili, and made "ants on a log".
~We gave Kayla a pedicure and facial.
~We each put a "keepsake" in Story's keepsake box for her to have when she becomes an adult.
~We each gave Kayla a charm to add to her charm bracelet so that she could take it in with her when she gave birth to Story Jade.
~We all brought a candle to light. So when we heard about Kayla going into labor and giving birth, we could light our candles and send prayers and good thoughts her way for a safe and healthy delivery and baby.

At Tabby's:

~We made chili and hotdogs. We ate cookies and chips.
~We gave Tabby a manicure and facial.
~We also gave her charms, keepsakes, and lit our candles, just like with Kayla's. The only difference is I made Molly's (Tabby's wee little bun in her oven) keepsake box and I bought Kayla's. :-)

And what goes in a keepsake box you ask? I put a homemade CD of tunes I thought Molly could use throughout her life for Tabby's Birth Blessing. For Kayla's, I put a picture of our entire Nunn clan (there is a bunch of us!!!) in Story's keepsake box. Absolutely anything can be used...as long as it is something special for the child to keep as it ages.

So if you've never done a Birth Blessing, I strongly suggest it. Its great fun and a great way to make the Mommy-to-Be feel special and loved.

Thanksgiving & Black Friday

First of all, I hope everyone had a very Happy Thanksgiving. I hope you ate way too much and took way too many naps. :-)

I had a normal Thanksgiving with my kinfolk in Tyner, Kentucky. Good food...especially the peanut butter pie. If you've never had peanut butter pie, then you need to rush out right now and get some. Trust me. You will not be disappointed.

I came home to dirty dishes and laundry that had to be brought in before it rained. The biggest surprise of the day though was bear poo in the front yard. That's right. B-E-A-R poo!!! I knew for the past couple of days I had been hearing something outside rummaging around. One night it scared me quite a bit even because I heard it walking through the leaves and it sounded WAY too big to be a dog. I was afraid to look outside to see what it was even...guess now I know. A bear!

Ah well...I won't be participating in the Black Friday events today. I did one year and I'll never, ever do it again. I don't care what they are selling or what deals they have, I will never go shopping on Black Friday ever again.

So good luck to all ya'll shoppers. Have fun. Be safe. Don't get pissed and kill any other shoppers...remember, its only "things" and "things" are not important. Not ever. Just people are important. So don't go biting the fingers off the chick that gets to the digital camera quicker than you or anything like that. :-)

Take care all!

B-E-A-utiful!

The wonders of Mother Nature never cease to amaze me.

My bed is at the perfect position to catch the rays of sun first thing in the morning. This is something that usually doesn't bother me, but I've been working third shift (or at least our version of it) and so I don't even lay my weary head down to rest until 3 a.m. When the sun comes poking through the window around 7, I get a little annoyed.

There is a young maple tree that sits in front of my window. We planted it when we built on to our house years and years ago. I think I was a Junior in high school maybe. Anyway, its been there awhile and its finally big enough that in the summer, when the green leaves are full and spread out in all their glory, it blocks out most of the morning sun's rays. Thus allowing me to sleep a little longer undisturbed.

Its November now though and the leaves are almost gone from my little maple. Its nice to be able to look out the window and see my pond and rolling hills on my family's farm and know that particular stretch of land belongs only to me (well, me and the credit union). Since the leaves are gone, the sun can now shine through pretty much without interuption and that's exactly what it did at 7 this morning.

I was tired and a little aggitated when the sun came crashing through, but when I got up from the bed to stumble downstairs I happened to notice just how beautiful the sunrise really was.

I'm not going to be all poetic on you now or anything like that, but I do think that sometimes in our hustle and bustle of everyday life, we really forget to just take a moment and breathe. Just soak it all in. The beauty of the world is amazing. For as much as they get on my nerves, people are even beautiful in their own way as well. Life is beautiful. You don't have to travel the globe or live a certain lifestyle to see these things and soak them all in, all you really have to do is just take the time and look.

You may be amazed at what you find.

 

(The frost melting off my window.)

H.P. 2009

Every year we have a Halloween party at my place. Its usually a pretty big event with games, prizes, food, contests, and a haunted house. This year it was a little different.

Actually, I'm quite disappointed in it this year. Don't get me wrong, I love seeing my family and friends and I love seeing all the costumes. There just wasn't much excitement this year.

It got cold and dark way too soon. The haunted trail we had made got blown down the day before in all the wind and rain and there wasn't time to fix it back. People were sick, which is always a worry. (Hope ya'll get to feeling better soon!)

On the plus side, we had good food (as usual), some fun games, there was music and karaoke, the Costume Contest went well, and the pinata was a hit (no pun intended). I got to see a purdy butterfly (before her Grandpa stole her away for the night), hang out with some cowboys and Indians, and even discovered some long lost Star Trek brother and sisters.

It was a good party, just could have been better. But I guess that's what next year is for. :-)

Transplanted Gypsy

I want to move to Louisiana.

I've always wanted to live somewhere besides Jackson County, even if only for a short time. I just could never decide where to go. Over the course of three years though I've managed to fall a little bit in love with the state of Louisiana.

The first year I just passed through...spending one night in Madisonville, one day in New Orleans, and another night in Lafayette. The second year I stayed in Slidell and spend a day or so in New Orleans. This year I managed a room right in the French Quarter about a block from party central (aka Bourbon Street).

New Orleans fascinates me. I love the architecture, the people are friendly, the food is AMAZING, the music is incredible...the list goes on and on. It would be a great place for a single gal or guy to live and have fun, but not a place I would want to raise my children. Nothing wrong with New Orleans in that aspect of things really, just that I'm a country girl born and raised on her family's farm and I'd kinda like to raise my children the same way.

This year we stopped in Verachie, Louisiana on our way home. It was a detour but well worth the time and effort. We toured the Oak Alley Plantation. Its beautiful. Everyone should go see it at least once. I really do suggest it. During our time there it actually stopped raining and the sun came out (so did the heat but oh well, beggars can't be choosers). I've always wanted to work at a museum or as a tour guide for a place like Oak Alley, hence the whole B.A. in History. It just never worked out that way. But I fell in love with Oak Alley (and in lust with a certain waiter, but that's a different story *ahem*) and now I want to go back. Soon. I'd like to see it all decked out for Christmas. I may go back later this year. You just never know with me. I'm a bit of a gypsy at times.

Anyway, other than Maine or Alaska (two places I've yet to go), Louisiana is a state that calls to me a great deal. Texas is pretty much tied with Louisiana at this point. So I figure that one day, I'll end up living in one of those two places. Probably not anytime in the near future...but one day.

Pre-Trip

So I'm headin' out to New Orleans (or Nawlins, as the locals call it) in the morning. I want to post blogs and photos on here of the trip, but after about ten-ish tomorrow morning, I won't have access to my computer for a few days (I know, I know...how will I ever make it???). So until we meet again, here is my pre-trip blog, with all the stuff I have done and still need to do before I ever make it to Louisiana.

Today I:
1. Stopped at Wal-Mart on my way home from work at 1 a.m. The store was deserted, but the aisles were not. Every dang aisle seemed to be closed so they could mop the floors. Maybe not EVERY aisle, but it certainly seemed like it was every aisle that I wanted to go down was blocked off. I had to get last minute supplies for the road trip (you know, necessities like Twizzlers and Sun Chips) as well as enough food to feed our army of dogs, cats, and chickens for the week. I had to pick up a few things for gifts for family and friends and their little bundles of joys as well. I didn't get home until 3:30 in the morning, thanks mostly to a) the sales-lady at Wal-Mart that chatted with me for fifteen minutes about her puppy and b) the fact that I live a hundred million miles away from civilization (or at least, a Wal-Mart). I didn't get in bed until five a.m. however, because my Mom decided it would be nice to chat for an hour and a half over what to expect on the trip.

2. I got up at 11 this morning and started in on all the trip stuff...but not before doing my regular, daily chores. I fed dogs, cats, chickens, and a brother. I hung out towels, only to run out ten minutes later in the pouring rain to get them and throw them in the dryer. I sorted through a few hundred photos I had recently gotten developed (and no, I'm not joking, there were that many), so that my various family members could have their copies of the most sought after ones. I packed. I hunted down things to pack. I showered. Then I headed to Richmond to work. Somehow I managed to have the time to stop at the bank on the way and withdraw some money for the trip.

Before I Leave, I:

1. Have to make a list of things to do and what to feed for Dad and Dillon. They aren't capable of figuring out such simple tasks on their own, so I have to leave them lists. To be fair, Dillon is only 13. I don't know what Dad's excuse is.

2. Have to feed/water the cats and chickens enough to last a couple of days. No reason putting too much on Dillon or Dad while I'm away. I mean, they have to feed the cats and chickens once a year usually, I sure would hate for them to have to do it too much more often than that.

3. Have to leave money for Dad and Dillon to get some pizza while we're gone. I don't have to do this, but I know the boys, and if I don't, they may starve (or resort to cooking...either one could be bad) while their women folk are on the road.

4. Have to shave. Yuck. I hate that part the most.

5. Have to finish packing. I'm only bringing one small duffle bag and then my makeup bag, but it takes two days to pack all this up. I'll never understand it. Not in a million years.

6. Finish my homework. (Yeah right!)

7. Find Ruby. (Ruby being my GPS.)

8. Sleep...somewhere in there I've got to find time to sleep.

Girls Night Out!!!

Tonight was a Girl's Night.

I picked up my younger cousin, Samantha (she's just a wee one at the tender age of 18) and we headed North to Richmond, KY. Making a quick pit stop in Berea so I could get some cash (it is payday Friday after all).

I had promised Sam that when the new Olive Garden opened in Richmond that I would take her there to eat. I've never ate at Olive Garden and she loves it (most everyone I know loves it in fact), so we have been keeping track all summer long as to when the doors would open. Next weekend is my much anticipated trip to New Orleans, so we decided to get a little Italian food this week. It was a twenty minute wait, but it all worked out perfectly because we also were expecting Sam's good friend, Maggie to stop by and join us. The wait gave her plenty of time to get there. The food was amazing. I took Kayla's advice and ordered the Ravioli di Portobello. It was delicious!!! I think I'll order it every time from here on out.

(Maggie & Sam)

After the Olive Garden we said goodbye to Maggie and headed to Lucky Lady's for a tattoo. I tried my hardest to corrupt Sam and get her to get one as well, but she wasn't very interested. I'm sure after watching them ink me (what with the blood droplets and all), she was even LESS interested.

This time I got a peacock on my left shoulder. I have a flower on my wrist (in honor of my Mother and she also designed it and got one similar to mine put on her chest) and a feminist symbol on the back of my neck. So my peacock was tattoo numero tres. A peacock wasn't exactly what I wanted. I wanted a phoenix. You know the fictional, fiery bird that rises from the ashes after its been burnt up? Well, I wanted that...and I wanted its tail to sort of circle its body and have "what goes around comes around" written within the circle. It didn't work out that way. Instead I got a peacock that is actually the combination of two different peacock designs. Its okay though. I love it all the same. It turned out really well. Its very pretty. Or at least I think so. And I like peafowl. I've always wanted a pet peacock but I have nowhere to put one, so I guess this is my way of getting one.

(My peacock tattoo.)

Anyway, after an hour in the tattoo shop, we headed over to the cinema to fill our bellies with ginormous cups of soda and a huge tub of popcorn (with some m&ms and Reese's pieces for desert) and watch "Whip It". I loved, loved, loved that movie. Even Sam liked it and I was a little worried that she wouldn't. I want to be a roller derby chick. I have since I was about 12. So this movie was awesome because of that alone, but it also had a great storyline and strong female characters. I liked it. Two thumbs up. And the soundtrack is just as awesome as the film.

Anyway, the night had to end eventually, so we got back in good ole JC around 11:30 or so and after some chatting in the driveway and petting some of Sam's cats, we ended the night with a hug and a promise to do it all again soon.

Tomorrow is reserved as a family day to watch "Zombieland" and try to get myself a car. Wish me luck. :-)

Love Your Mother

I love my Mom.

We don't always get along. In fact we have had some pretty bad arguments in our day, but what Mother/Daughter duo hasn't?

For those of you that don't know her, let me tell you a bit about my Mom.

My Mother's ancestry is a nice little mixture of Cherokee and Irish. She was born and raised in Tyner, Kentucky and is the eldest of five children. She practically raised her brothers and sisters from the time she was nine years old. I'll not go into details here as to why that is, but just know that its the truth. She grew up poor, but it made her strong and determined to have a better life one day.

There are things I still don't understand about my Mother. Things she does and says that drive me batty. We definitely don't always see eye to eye, but I still love her.

She has her faults but we all do and its taken me some time to come to terms with the fact that neither of my parents are perfect. They just are who they are and we all try to get along.

Which I have to say, getting along with my Mother has been a lot easier since I started my new job. I'm not home when she's at home. We get along perfect that way. :-) See my shift is from 4:30 p.m. until 1:00 a.m. She leaves for work at 6:30 in the morning and doesn't get home until 4:30 or so. We don't really see each other until my days off and on Sundays. This makes for a lot more pleasant quality time together.

And we've been spending a lot more quality time together as well. She was my concert buddy last weekend in Lexington. Nothing quite as fun as seeing your prim and proper (because trust me, she is a lot more prim and proper than me) Mother getting soaked in a downpour at a country music concert. Well...maybe the fact that I also got her a wee bit drunk and tried to get her to dance and sing along with me added to the fun quotient. My Mom just doesn't do that sort of thing and I've decided I'm a bad influence on her because I always try to get her to do stuff like that. :-) I paid for the concert of course. It was my treat. She's 46 and has never been to an actual concert and I felt like it was time that she had that experience. She had a blast. Next time she wants to try a rock concert, but I'm not sure she's ready for that just yet. ;-)

Next week we are high-tailing South over my break from school. We're going to the Big Easy. One of my favorite places in the world. This will make our third trip to New Orleans. I love that city. This year we are getting a place right in the French Quarter and Mom's best friend Louise, and one of my good chums, Hattie, are going with us. I'm doing all the driving and planning, like I always do, but in return Mom has promised to make sure that I make it back to the hotel if I get too tipsy to know where I'm going. :-) She's good about stuff like that.

I could go on and on about what a groovy chick my Mom is, but I'll not bore you to tears with that. I'll not make you sad with any stories about the bad times either. But since Halloween will soon be here, I think I need to tell you this much about my Mom. She is the reason I'm the way I am when it concerns Halloween and anything science fiction or horror. I owe a great deal of gratitude to her for that.

From as far back as I can remember, Mom has always watched shows like Star Trek, The Addams Family, The Munsters, Tales from the Crypt (on the rare occasion we could actually afford HBO), and all manner of anything sci-fi or horror. I've been watching scary movies since I came out of the womb. Mom loves Star Wars too, so I grew up on those movies as well. Some of my favorite movies are the cheesy B-movies with clay-mation monsters and names like "Food of the Gods" because they all make me think of my Mom. I was never allowed to stay up late unless a movie like that was coming on, then she would make special allowances (even on school nights) and set up and watch them with me.

My bedtime stories were ghost stories that she had heard or had experienced herself. Mom is famous for such stories. She can scare most people with the tales she tales. I learned that from her too. That's part of the reason why I love to write so much. I have a binder full of my short stories from the time I was old enough to write on up through high school. Most of them horror stories. I have my Mother to thank for that.

Mom only really reads two types of books. Romance novels (YUCK!!!) and horror novels (YAY!!!). I wasn't much interested in the romance junk as a kid, but I used to beg and beg for the horror novels. She never let me read them. I had to make due with Goosebumps and Fear Street from the school library. I was in high school before she turned over her horror collection to me. It was a small collection, but I've added to it immensely through the years. She borrows horror books from me now. Both of our favorite kinds are zombie stories. I get my love of all things zombie from her too. (Note: This weekend "Zombieland" opens. Mom, Dad, and my brother, Dillon, and I are going Saturday to watch it as a "family movie night." Is it strange that "family movie night" revolves around horror movies? Or that "family TV night" happens to revolve around a show like "Supernatural"? I hope not.) One of our favorite activities when we travel together is to plan for zombie attacks. As in, "If a zombie attack happened right now, what would you do?" Its a great way to keep yourself entertained and keep your imagination going while you are stuck in traffic, believe me.

Mom used to dress up as a witch and chase me around the house too. It didn't matter what time of year it was or what time of day either. If I asked nicely enough (i.e. if I begged and whined), then she would lock herself in the bathroom until she was ready. I would wait eagerly outside the door. When she opened it up I would take off in terror. She would chase me through the house and through the yard, doing her evil witch laugh and I would scream and shriek like a banshee. I was serious too. The game always ended with me crying and begging her to take the outfit back off and never put it on again (only, of course, to do the same thing a week later).
(Mom, Halloween last year)

Mom doesn't brag on me often, she doesn't want me to "get the big head" but when she does, she means it. I've done a lot of things that she didn't get to do and I'm a completely different person from her. I graduated high school, graduated college, I have a "career" rather than a "job", I still live in JC, but its not something permanent. I pay for my own way in life. I don't ask anyone for anything and I don't take crap off of anyone. I'm not afraid to go after whatever it is that I want. I travel. I speak my mind. I'm not afraid to look stupid or make a mistake. Mom is some of those things and some of them she's not. But I've learned how to do those things from watching her. Good or bad, I've learned who I want to be and who I don't want to be, partially from my Mother. And I can't help but to love her for that.


(Mom and Me, back in the day)

This Is Halloween

I love, love, love Halloween!!!

Its not my favorite holiday (that honor goes to Christmas) but it is a very close second.

I've always celebrated Halloween. I was born in May 1982 and my very first Halloween costume came in October 1982. I don't remember it obviously, but I'm told that I made a very cute Raggedy Ann. I dress up for school and for work. If I don't have either, then I dress up and hit the town. I've dressed up every year except for Halloween 2000.

Just a few days before Halloween that year, my older cousin Bridgette passed away. She was 24. I was 18. I just didn't have it in me to dress up that year. It seemed too soon after her death to celebrate anything...let alone something as joyous as Halloween. In all honesty though, Bridgette's death taught me to celebrate Halloween even more. It took me a few years, but shortly after Bridgette passed, I started having a Halloween party of my own for family and friends.

(Bridgette & Me, 1983) (Bridgette's Senior Picture)

It started out simple enough. Our first year it was primarily just family, I paid for most of it, there were a few games and prizes, a Costume Contest, some karaoke, and a "haunted hay maze." As the years went on though, the party grew and grew. These days I can no longer afford to pay for it all because there are just too many people. Its still focused mainly on children but now the children include both family and friends and the occasional neighbor that happens to wander down Nunn Road. Everyone brings candy and food or drinks. Most people dress up (including the adults) and participate in the Costume Contest.


There's always a lot going on at the party, and I usually run myself ragged (I usually have blisters on my feet by the time the night is over...no joke), but I love it. Its worth it every time a kid asks me, "When are we doing this again?!" They are always a little disappointed when I tell them they have to wait until next year.

This year will be the fifth year for the party. I hope to make it bigger and better than before. Costume Contest, karaoke, Lip Syncing Contest, pinata, dancing, games, prizes, haunted house, so on and so forth. Maybe even some after dark scary movies set up outside to get us all in the spooky Halloween mood. Who knows? I like to plan a little...and then play a little by ear. That's just how I am.

Each year I send out invitations to those that are regulars to the party. I call it "April's Annual Halloween Bash" and our motto is "The party don't stop, until somebody cries!" (Because I have successfully made either an adult or a child, and sometimes both, cry from fear before the night is over.) I'm thinking of changing the name though...in honor of Bridgette. After her passing I learned a great deal about the importance and value of life and the people you have in it, especially your family and those you consider to be family. Since I started the party as a way to bring us all closer after her death, I'm thinking of changing the name to reflect that. I'm just not sure what to change it to as of yet.

Anyway, October 24th is the date of the party this year. I hope to see you there. I'll be the man in blue with the pointy ears. ;-)

(My costume this year.)

Mommies, mommies, everywhere!

It occurs to me that most of my "friends" on here are mothers. Most...not all...but most. Originally I started this as a way to chronicle my road to becoming a single Mom (by choice) by becoming artificially inseminated. My intentions haven't changed in the least, but my blog has.


Just as there is more to every Mother than just the fact that she is someone's mother, there is more to me than being the crazy, weird chick that will get knocked up by a test tube. Since I'm not currently planning on implanting any spermies until January 2010, then I wanted to use this blog to post random, and sometimes a bit out there, thoughts and feelings and memories and all that stuff, that run through my head from time to time.


I'm not sure anything I say is worthy of a nomination like Kayla gave me, but I do intend to use this to voice whatever opinions I may have about artificial inseminiation, motherhood, friendship, feminism, and life in general. You are welcome to read it or to not. Hopefully sometime in 2010 I'll be able to join the ranks of the Mommy bloggers on here and give you updates on the procedure, the pregnancy, and ultimatly on being my own version of a happy single mother. Until then, just bare with me and welcome to my crazy life.

Too Many Flowers

Let me start by saying this: I am pro-choice. No I don't want to have an abortion...not ever. I don't ever want to be in a situation where I have to make a choice like that. I love children and babies. I think life is precious. I think every child is a blessing, even ones that don't come at the best of times or ones that have health problems. But I am pro-choice. Abortion is a hard decision to make for most women. Or at least that is what I think. But it is a decision that each woman has to make on her own. I won't judge. I would take all the free babies in the world if I could, but I can't. And some women just don't want kids or at least don't want the ones in their womb at that time. But I think of it as their decision, not mine. Instead I pray that they all make the right decision...whatever is best for them and what they can live with.

Now. That's out of the way. Let me say this too.

I think adoption is a wonderful thing. There are lots and lots of little children, teenagers, babies...all over the world that need nice and loving homes. Those children would be a blessing to any family, anywhere. I'm a strong supporter of putting unwanted babies up for adoption. Mother Teresa once said, "Saying there are too many children, is like saying there are too many flowers." (or something along those lines) and I agree with her. Children are a beautiful blessing upon the world. I know there is an over-population problem. But that is why family planning and sex education is so important. That way, perhaps, we can eliminate some of these "unwanted" pregnancies before they even happen. That's my opinion anyway. But for those children that are here and need a home, then adoption is an amazing thing! But as I said with abortion...I try not to judge.

But life is a gift if you choose to receive it and enjoy it. And children are blessings. And that is why I want to be a Mother so badly, that I'm willing to get artificially inseminated. I would do adoption, but the laws being the way they are, its extremely difficult for a single gal such as myself to adopt. It costs a great deal of money and I may not be allowed to adopt anyway. So I've chosen this route.

The point behind this blog however, isn't necessarily me and my journey, instead this is a comment on others.

I know quite a few pregnant ladies right now. Some of them blogging away on here.

My friend Brandon and his wife, Nikki are expecting their first child next year. Its a girl. I'm not sure on a name yet, because I'm not sure they know what they are going to be naming her. All I know is I have to buy pink stuff for them. That's fine by me. :-)

I already have pink stuff bought for my friend, Tabby and her hubby, Harold. They are expecting a new addition to their little family in December. Her name is Molly. And we are all excited to meet her. I'm in the process of planning a Birth Blessings party for Mrs. Sams (our friend Hattie is helping me) as we speak. I'll be sure to post a blog about Birth Blessings for you all to read later on, since not a lot of people are familiar with such a thing. I'm happy for Tabby because now she has a wee little miss to go with her big boy, Mikey. I'm sure he's going to be a super big brother as well.

My cousin Ashlee and her husband, Daniel are expecting their first child in February. They found out yesterday that it will be a little girl. Ashlee told me last night that they would name her Isabella and call her Bella for short. I will be Bella's Godmother. I'm excited, nervous, and very, very happy. And I know that if it works out to where Bella's Godmother gets to be in the delivery room when she makes her grand appearance in the world, then the Godmother will surely cry like a big, fat girl. But some things are worth the tears. I go tomorrow to buy Bella a car seat. I also have to help plan Bella's baby shower and Bella's Mommy's Birth Blessings party. Bella is a handful already! But a very much blessed handful. :-)

My other cousin, Travis and his wife, Melody, are expecting their second child shortly. Their first baby, Lily Raine, will be a big sister (although she's not very big right now, she turns one year old next month) to a bouncing baby boy. Travis told me a few weeks ago, that the name for said boy child will be either Whitley or Mason (but he's hoping for Mason). So congratulations to them. I have a few boy items tucked safely away in a cedar closet and I will be happy to buy a few more to take to Breathitt County for a gift for the wee one.

There are babies everywhere right now. And I have baby fever myself. But I have to wait. Which is distressing but I'm sure the right decision all the same.

That being said, there is also sad baby news.

My friend Amy and her husband Adam, found out just the other day that they had lost their wee little one. There was no heartbeat when she went for her checkup and so the doctor had to do a D&C. My heart goes out to them. My prayers too.

My other cousin, Emily and her husband, Danny, have had to withstand two heartbreaking miscarriages. The most recent one this past May. Its been very difficult on Emily. And she still struggles with it. Especially since she knows most of these same people that I do, that are currently expecting bundles of joy, and it makes it difficult for her to be there and fully participate in their happiness. I understand this. They understand this. Its just how life is sometimes. Life is never fair.

My Aunt had a miscarriage roughly 8 years ago, before she had a successful pregnancy with her daughter Summer. Summer is a blessing that just turned 7 this year. But my Aunt will tell you that even now, all these years later, she sometimes wonders about the other baby. She wonders what it would have been, what it would have looked like, the things it would have done. And I suppose Amy, Emily, and any other woman who has ever miscarried or lost a child, will always wonder such things.

I wanted to blog about these things today because it is a very up and down time emotionally in the world of babies. People are pregnant and healthy. People are pregnant and cautious. People have lost little babies that they thought and hoped were snug and safe in their tummies. People are trying and trying to have little ones. Or are giving up and taking a different route. There are women like me that are going to attempt our own way of doing things. Life is like that.

Life is a beautiful gift if you so choose to accept it. Don't waste a second of it. Don't ever doubt that you are blessed in some way. Love your life or change it until you do love it. And if you have a wee one of your own (or a not so wee one) then give them a hug today. A kiss. And tell them you love them. And when they are mean (cause all children are at some point in time), discipline them as you see fit, but do it with love. Do everything you do with love. Cause life is short, unfair, and can be quite brutal at times. So don't waste a second of it. And love everyone in it.

God bless you all. :-)