City Mouse vs. Country Mouse

I'm home.

Not home, as in, "a place to sleep" but actually H-O-M-E.

People have had a hard time understanding why I've moved back to Jackson County when I've been living in Richmond these past several months, so I thought I would try to explain.

First, there is the obvious...its cheaper. True, it will cost more as far as gas is concerned, but other than that, it is a lot cheaper to live in Gray Hawk. I don't have to pay rent and I have a home of my own (albeit a tiny little thing) that I've been trying to fix up the past several years. I have bills outside of paying my rent and because I'm moving back, I've been able to pay off three of those bills. Its a great sense of accomplishment to be able to say I'm a little closer to being debt free. So yeah, its cheaper. The distance I have to travel to work and class kinda stinks, but I can live with it. I've done it for years, so I'm pretty sure its nothing I won't be able to handle for a while longer.

There are other reasons I moved back though.

I'm a small town kinda gal, I've discovered. In all my traveling, its the smaller towns that I enjoy visiting the most and when my travels are finished, its Gray Hawk that I enjoy coming back too. Living in Richmond was nice because it was convenient. I could walk to my favorite restaurants, go shopping at all hours of the night or day, it took five minutes to get to work, and thirty minutes to get to class. It was great for those reasons...but really, those were the only reasons it was great.

I thought when I moved to Richmond I would get to see the people I care about more often. I was wrong. Everyone has such busy lives (including me) and it was hard to get everyone together. I lived literally two minutes from my Goddaughter and yet I hardly ever saw her. My life centered around work and school. The only time I was actually at the apartment was when I was sleeping. Sad but true. Sure I had a couple of parties and I shared my futon with my cousin, Kayla, but otherwise, it was pretty lonesome. I'm quite shy and quiet in person, but as a general rule, I do like being in contact with people from time to time. Living in the apartment made me feel like a hermit. Someday I'd like to be a hermit living all alone in a cabin way back in a hollow somewhere, but that day isn't anytime in my near future. 

I like living in Gray Hawk. I have a love/hate relationship with Jackson County most days. There are things I hate about my hometown. I mean, I despise some things! But on the whole, I like it here. Its home. In all my time living in Richmond, I never called it home. It was always "the apartment" and when I came back to Jackson County on the weekends, I always told folks I was "going home."

I like that when I see people out, even people I don't really know, I can say 'Howdy" and they will say it back. I like that when there is a funeral procession driving by, people stop on the side of the road out of respect and wait for it to pass. I like that people wave at you when you meet them on the road, whether you know them or not. I like that people I know ask me how my family is when they talk to me and how that people I just met can look at me and know who "my people" are just by the shape of my nose or the way I smile. I like the feeling of being connected to people when they figure out that they went to high school with one of my cousins or used to work with my Mom or whatever the case may be.

Living in a small town can suck, don't get me wrong. People gossip about everything and everyone. If someone has a grudge against you, then you will hear about it for years and years. Certain families can't get along with other families. A lot of things are "political" in nature. There isn't a wide variety of places to shop or eat or have any other form of entertainment. There are brilliant people and there are ignorant people, and most of us fall somewhere in between. But you will find all those things in a lot of other places, at least at home, I KNOW where I stand with folks. I know who to avoid and who I can trust.

I like being able to open my windows and let in a cool breeze. I like that my cats can climb trees in my front yard and that Emmie can meow as loud as she wants and no one will tell me to get rid of her. I like that I can walk for miles down my road, by myself, at night and still feel safe. And while I'm walking there will be at least half a dozen people that know me that will stop and ask if I've had car trouble and need some help. I've had it happen lots of times. I like the trees and the flowers and the birds and all the other animals. These things I've missed since I moved to Richmond.

And I like that first glimpse of my family's "homeplace" when I drive over the hill. There is no prettier place in the world than that hillside when the sun is setting. No place.



So that's why I moved back. The catalyst may have been a cantankerous lying landlord, but in the end, its because this place makes me feel happy, safe, and loved. I couldn't ask for anything better than that. 

Renter No More!

I get to move out this week! This both saddens and excites me. Its definitely mixed emotions at this point. Allow me to explain...(as if you had any other choice).

I like living in Richmond. I like being within walking distance of my favorite restaurants and my bank. I like being able to go to Wal-Mart, Kroger, and Meijer's at any point in the day. I like being five minutes from work and thirty minutes from school. I like the fact that I can run over and visit my Goddaughter whenever I feel the need and I can go home during my lunch break instead of eating out of a fast food joint. I like knowing that when it snows, I can usually make it to my own bed, rather than crashing on someone's couch. I like all these things about living in Richmond. But...that's about it. In other words, I like the convienence of it, but nothing more.

When I first moved up here I thought it was going to be sooooo much fun! I would have people stopping by all the time and maybe even have a few parties here and there. I could go shopping whenever I wanted. I could take naps during my lunch breaks. I could work out at the gym across the road. I could drive a short distance and visit Kayla and Ashlee whenever they were home. It was going to be AWESOME!!!

Guess what? It wasn't like that at all. Ashlee and Kayla are super busy with work and school and having little baby girls running around their homes. Kayla moved shortly after I did. I don't have parties. I don't take naps. I go to the gym, but I can do that regardless of where I call home. No one visits, because I'm never home. I go to work, I go to school, and I come to the apartment to sleep. That's about the long and short of it. I don't even get to shop because all my money is going to rent and utilities, so there's no moolah to spend.

This is disappointing, but I was willing to stick it out up until the "cat incident". Yeah, that's what I'm calling it now.

For those that don't know me well enough, let me explain something about myself. It takes A LOT to make me angry. In fact, I've been told that I am way too nice and laid back about things. I don't get angry enough with people. But when I do get mad about something or at someone, then that is the absolute end of it for me. I will never like that person again and that particular situation will make me miserable until I remove it from my life. Since the "cat incident" I have been miserable here in Richmond. After work, I drive around for twenty minutes to try to avoid going back to the apartment. I hate it there now...and I despise everyone that has anything to do with it.

So today, I went to talk to the landlord. I wanted out of my lease. I don't want to pay for something that I'm not using (which coincidentally is one reason why I should have never thought I could rent in the first place. I am not the type that likes paying for something that will NEVER be my own.), so I had determined I needed to get out of the lease ASAP and using any means necessary. Now I was prepared to be mean about it, but I hated to do that. Of course, there is no real nice way to tell someone "I am not going to pay you anymore. Kiss my ass." So I opted for a strategy I have seen work many, many times for other women I know. A strategy I have never used in my life and feel somewhat ashamed to have stooped to such a level. I feel its beneath me. I used...pity. Yes, yes, I swallowed my pride and used pity. "Poor little April. That nice, quiet girl next door. She just needs a break and she's having a hard time of it right now. We should all feel sorry for her. Oh...and let her out of her lease." ;-)

Well...it worked. Helps that the landlord is a man I suppose. A woman would have seen right through it. And I'm also happy to report that I did not have to resort to crocodile tears. I was prepared to do just that, but it wasn't necessary in the end.

So I'm out of my lease. I am moving out this weekend. He already has another renter lined up. And I get my deposit back. Go me!

To be continued...